May 3, 2014: CALL OFF THE JAM!!!!!!

The day finally arrived.

It's been three years in the making. 

First, a lack of insurance caused an issue.

Then some shattering bones during practice delayed the start. 

Then some @ss running into Roxi while she was on her motorcycle and then driving off.

All those things didn't deter Roxi Razorbomb from doin' Derby!!! 

On May 3, 2014 Roxi Razorbomb made her Roller Derby Fresh Meat debut!!

We were there. With signs.  Screaming from the sidelines.

Giggling a bit when every time she got up she gave her top a little hoist. (Apparently they fell when she fell.)

SCREAMING when the coach was trying to get the Fresh Meat Jammers to call off the jam. 

Being so proud when our Roxi won Defense MVP for her very first bout.

#27 is Roxi Razorbomb!!

Using what her Daddy gave her to keep Venus' jammer from advancing

Fresh Meat Score Keeper!

"I don't understand the sign. But it's funny. I don't know why. But it seems funny!!"

One minute left in the bout and Roxi lands in the penalty box.
*WOOT*

You'll get 'em next time Purple Poppies!!

This was a double header. After the Fresh Meat bout there was bout with the "big girls".  (Katherine referred to the Fresh Meat ladies as the "little girls".)  As we watched Rogue do their thing Katherine commented... "They don't fall down as much as (Roxi's) team!!!"

Rogue ladies are serious business.  They are tough.  They are fast.  They are AWESOME!!!  I'd say I want to be like them when I grow up but, let's be practical... This girl isn't cutout for Roller Derby.  They had a raffle and I swore the gift certificate said "spa".  I didn't put my ticket into it because I figured - meh, it's in Fayetteville, what are the chances I'll drive out there on the off chance I win?  Thank goodness... It was for a tattoo place.  $200 for a tattoo place.  It was a hot commodity at the raffle table.  I was thinking massage.  They're thinking INK.  This girl is cut out for facials, massages, manis & pedis.  Being pushed onto a concrete floor... AND getting back up?! Me?  Funny right? Yeah.  I snorted laughing myself at the thought.

As a note, I did win the Mom raffle basket filled with all sorts of things to be pampered with.  Now that's what I'm talking about.  :) bubble bath, sparkly body mist, some books, a candle... and best of all: A Mother's Day card from the Rogue team!! #fanstruck

The Rogue ladies kicked some arse... a 200+ point win... Great way to kick off the season!!

GO ROGUE or GO HOME!!

#weloveRoxi

May 2, 2014: The internet is in a drought

K: Mom, the internet didn't work in my classroom today.
Me: Oh, really? What was going on?
K: I don't know. We're thinking it's an internet drought.

Mkay then.

Today I spent 40 minutes with Katherine's kindergarten class doing an art project. We used shaving cream to paint flower pictures.  It was fun!! and not as messy as I thought it would be.  One highlight was apparently the little boy that "absolutely HATES" me wasn't there. Good for him. He thinks I'm horribly mean... Why you ask? Because at a birthday party he was pushing kids off a bench. So they started pushing him back. I told them all (including my own child) to keep all hands, feet and other body parts to themselves. I'm now that mom.  Oh yeah!!! #meanmother

While I was there Katherine's teacher told me about the project Katherine's been working on for mother's day.  They're making paper moms and wrote a little something about Mom.  Well... her teacher asked her to pick out the color paper for her mom.

She picked brown.

The teacher said, "Katherine is that the color you meant for your Mom? What color skin does your mom have?"

She picked dark brown. 

**Hold on here... does she think I'm Poppy?!!!!**

The teacher asked her again... Are you sure you have the right color for your Mom? Is her skin kind of like mine?

Katherine said, "Fiiiiiiine, I'll do white."

Sorry to disappoint ya kiddo.

I see a Mahogany card in my future.

After school she was playing outside with Stephen and they found a caterpillar. Stephen says she RAN to the garage to get her bug cage so she could put it in there.  She claims she's going to let it go tomorrow. I think she thinks it's going to be a butterfly by then. I didn't have the heart to tell her this isn't the Hungry Little Caterpillar.

Tonight was the Spring Festival at school too. I know.  Busy day, right?  Katherine got to go to the book fair and pick out her two books. We have $2 to put in the Disney bucket.  She thinks we're half way to Disney at this point.  We have like $10 in there. That's totally enough, right?!

Stephen found a book he needed to get too.

No joke. He bought this book.
scratch that. I bought this book for him. 

She had a BLAST on the swings with Stephen pushing her.  This would not fly in my world.  Wayyyyyy too much air going on here. But then you see that face and how can ya not?

higher higher!!!!!

Just swinging here... Yep. that's the 2nd story school window.
No biggie.

Tomorrow is the big debut of Roxi Razorbomb!!! My sister's first Roller Derby bout! We've made signs.  We've got tickets and we're ready to watch Roxi kick some @ss!!!! So excited!!!

May 1, 2014: Tears. OOOOHHHHH the Tears!!!

Is it Friday yet?

It's not is it.

Crap.

One.more.day.

Today started with tears and ended the same way.  Katherine has a Time Tracker for the morning. Why? Because the girl simply CANNOT be trusted to get up, get dressed, make her bed and get downstairs to eat breakfast in a reasonable amount of time.

So rather than fight I bought and implemented one of these.  It is green when she has time.  Yellow when she's approaching the end of time and red when she needs to really get a move on.

Today it's blinking red when I go down to check on her after getting out of my shower.  What is she doing? Dancing, with no clothes on, in the bathroom while talking to herself. 

I tell her she has until it stops blinking to be dressed.  There's not a shot in the dark she's gonna make it.  She starts to have a fit.  The tears begin.  Next thing ya know she loses a toy. 

She gets downstairs finally and eats some breakfast and is happy-go-lucky.  Like a faucet turned off the tears. 

Tonight, tears because she had a fit about taking something to a friend. There were tears. Then there were tears on top of tears because she had a booboo that was going to get water on it. In the shower. 

Sweet.Mary.Mother. 

And then she went to bed without a story because she had such a fit.  Which led to the listening at her bedroom door to her rantings and (our) giggling.  

"I demand you bring me back my toys right now!!... maybe they didn't hear me. I'll say it louder. I demand you bring me back my toys!! No one is listening. No one can hear me...." 

Oh we heard you babe. We're just not feeding into you.  

And then we wonder if our parents did the same thing when we were younger? We're going with no. We don't think they found us nearly as amusing as we find her.  

On a positive note, tonight we put together our Disney Cruise bucket.  Our friends implemented this great idea in their house.  The idea is if K is out and wants something we can give her the choice of getting the "thing" or putting that money in the Disney Cruise bucket. OR If we say no, BUT I will put that money towards the Disney Cruise.  

So far we have her $5 that she got for Easter from Grandma + all of the change from our change cup in the bucket.  Let's see how much we can collect.  She's already talking about taking the rest of her budget money (which now she says she's not going to spend all of it) from the book fair and put the rest here.  Yay!!!  

BTW - Apparently the pet rock was not a hit.  She claims her friends laughed at her. I tried to tell her they probably thought it was just silly - they weren't laughing at her.  She told me "no mom, it's the exact opposite of what you just said.  Whatever that is - it's the opposite! Trust me." Alrighty then.

Tomorrow IS Friday. Gawd Bless America.