One Month Later

It's one month and 3 days later and while no repairs have been made, we continue to take small steps towards repair work starting.

On Monday K and I took a walk up up the block to take some pictures of "one month later". As we walked, and looked around, I thought as I have many times, about how until this event I didn't understand why New Orleans and other areas so damaged by Katrina weren't completely rebuilt yet. How could that be? How in this modern first world country that be the case? While I don't profess to know damage anything to the extent that those poor people have, I do realize the magnitude a little better.

One of the things that S and I talk about often is how fortunate we are to have experienced a tornado such as we did that didn't wipe out an entire area, but rather hit smaller areas pretty significantly. As a result the "systems" needed to run the city and businesses were all still in place for the most part. Our "infrastructure" wasn't impacted by the tornado, only by the volume of need. It's this specifically that makes us realize how difficult those weeks/months following Katrina must have been for the residents of New Orleans and the other impacted areas. One month later and only a few people on the block have made any significant progress. Many of us continue to *discuss* things with our insurance company and adjusters. Others are now going through the process of getting estimates from contractors and signing contracts with them for the work. We're part of both groups. :) All of this also breaks my heart for the people in Alabama. I can't imagine what they're still going through.

We signed a contract for repair work on Tuesday. To say the last two weeks leading up to finally signing was wrought with indecision would be an understatement. Seriously. We bought this house with less discussion and stress than selecting a contractor proved to be. Two days into our contract and we couldn't be happier with the decision we made. We signed a contract with Carolina Restoration. This was also the company that came out the days immediately after the tornado to help secure so many homes on our block, ours included. They were our saviors then for coming when the contractors our insurance company sent arrived and couldn't do half of the work we needed them to do. (I'll remind you they left saying they were going to get a ladder and never came back. Or called.) We called CR and they came, literally, within minutes of the phone call. I'd say I don't know why we had such angst over picking someone to do the repairs - but I do know. It's our biggest investment, our family home and it's damaged. There are so many contractors that are out to try to scam the homeowners, insurance companies and whoever else they can get money from that a lot of folks are uneasy about what to do. We want our home to be fixed, and fixed right. We want to know that the people doing the work are going to be honest with us. I really feel confident that CR has that team.

Within a few hours of signing our contract my newest BFF, Travis, contacted our insurance adjuster about our HVAC. Reminder: It's been 33 days without HVAC. (Still so grateful for Michelle allowing us to borrow the window unit!!! We promise, Rach will have it back in time to go to NY in August!! ;) Hopefully we'll be through with it next week!! Travis emailed our adjuster with the total estimate repairs and requested that the HVAC portion be approved immediately. Needless to say our dear friends at the insurance company didn't immediately oblige. It took Travis' persistence and today the replacement system was approved!! YAYYYYYY!! It'll be 90 degrees this weekend and while I don't think we'll have the units installed by then, at least we'll know they're coming. Hopefully the *thought* will keep us cool. ;)

As for our insurance company... We had two claims approved this week. Our personal property claim was approved and the HVAC approved today. The personal property claim included all of the hours we worked on the house and clean up. I didn't realize that we could have (and maybe should have?) hired someone to help clean up the inside of the house. Had we, the insurance company would have paid that. Since we did the work, we were able to estimate the hours worked and get some money for that. $10 an hour. I might have taken the cleaning people even if to just do the first round of cleaning. Another lesson learned. (Although I'm not sure I could have waited long enough for them to come clean.)

The last few weeks S has been the one fighting with the insurance company. I thought I'd give it a whirl on Monday. I called and had my questions and was told that while there's an adjuster's name on our claim, he's not our actual adjuster. Our "adjuster" is now a bank of folks. Whoever answers the phone is who you work with. Okay. I don't so much like that - but I don't s'pose they care about my opinion. In fact, I can guarantee they don't. My call with La Bruja (thank you Dora for teaching me that phrase) resulted in me telling her three times to lower her voice and stop yelling at me. I reminded her at least twice that I was the customer AND was the one who was having the issues. La Bruja took these opportunities to tell me "I'm sorry I'm yelling at you, but you're asking me these questions!!" Ah. Wellll, Yes. That's my role as the customer. Your role as the insurance adjuster is to, I don't know... Answer them. I think this whole exchange made me more angry by the fact that I'm routinely in this situation at work. While I do have calls where folks call to chat and have a status update, more often than not it's someone yelling at me. Yelling back at them for asking questions? Mmm. Not so much. In fact if anyone on my team ever did that to a customer, we'd be having a serious CTJ ("Come to ..." name your favorite higher power) conversation. I concluded the call with "thanks for your time. I think our conversation has gone as far as it can. Have a good day." I thought given how my head was spinning and snakes were coming out of my ears I was so angry I handled that pretty well. The recording of the call might say otherwise, but whatever. ;)

So there is progress! Each week a little more towards getting back to "normal".

Some special thanks in this blog to some very kind people: A family in Raleigh read about what happened to the families on our block. They decided, along with several friends, to take up a collection to help the folks on our block. They wanted to be able to provide a gift card to each family on the block. Last night the family and many of the neighbors (whether staying on the block or not) were here to receive the gift cards and more importantly, say thank you. I wasn't sure what to expect, but I can tell you I did NOT expect to receive a $110 gift card. Each family on the block received one. They raised what had to be thousands of dollars to be able to do this for everyone. I can speak for those that I talked with last night, and my own family: we were amazed and so very thankful for their generosity. Kellie and friends: Thank you from the bottom of our hearts. You're all very special people.

Today we received in the mail a special card and gift from some of our amazing co-workers and friends. We appreciate your support so much and your friendship even more. Our thanks & hugs to the Sherman Family (NJ), Garner Family (CA), Laurie K (IN), Darnell M (LA), Dennis L (NY), Brown Family (NC), Sharon S (CO), Donna T (NJ), Karen F (IA), Bhasme Family (NC), Kitty M (NC), Bloom Family (GA) and The Blanks (TX). Jen, thanks for organizing. No one rally's the troops better than you do. xo

Next update, maybe I'll have pictures of our new HVAC units. I know what you're thinking. Ooohhh sexy!! Mmmmhhhmmmm...*nodding head* Oh yeah. ;)

Love to all!!
Dar, Stephen & KK
xo

Pictures... One month later:

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3 week update...

Yesterday marked three weeks since the Tornado came down Serendipity Drive. As I worked outside with Katherine along side of me, it warmed my heart to see her and her friend (neighbor) playing outside. The last few weeks one of the things that's made me sad has been the fact that there haven't been any kids playing outside. Usually you can hear them laughing, yelling (happy), and just general kid sounds. (Bikes, scooters, racing, etc) Given that we haven't had our sidewalks clear for them to play on, that wasn't possible. Add in, that most of the families on the street have temporarily relocated to an apartment or house until their homes are fixed = Quiet. Saturday, we had some kid noise. It was muffled somewhat by me shop-vacing the lawn, but they were out there playing. Progress. I like it.

One of the reasons they were able to go outside to play was due to the work that occurred last week with debris clean up (thanks again to our neighbors & the volunteers). Not only did that debris get picked up but all of the yard debris that Stephen and a crew of folks piled up (3 Leland Cypress trees + other stuff) in front of our house, was also picked up this week. YEAH!!! A big truck with a crane like thing on it came by and picked it all up in three swoops. Impressive stuff.

Thursday we had a couple of contractors come to our house to estimate the repairs. We anticipate getting their "reports" this week and will compare that to what the insurance adjuster submitted. Also heard from them this week. We have the first round of things approved, but there's more documentation needed for some other parts to get approved. Specifically the HVAC. The one thing we REALLY need to get fixed, pretty quickly. Raleigh, North Carolina summers are not known to be forgiving. I didn't think people inhabited the south until air conditioners were invented. And if they did, people were fanning them. I've asked Stephen to do this, and he said some things back that I don't think I should repeat. ;)

A few nights last week we spent time doing various tasks in the yard. One night two friends came over to help re-bag yard waste that the city wouldn't remove unless it was in clear bags. Without their help that task would have taken us hours to complete. With their help... Little over 30 minutes. THANKS Jesse & Jeremy!!

Friday we thought it would be fun to get the neighbors together. We had a little "Seis de Mayo" party at our house. Little taco salad, some amazing nachos prepared by our neighbor, salsa brought by another neighbor and beverages brought by everyone!! It was fun and allowed us all to catch up on what's been going on.

One of the discussion topics was contractors. Particularly a contractor that came through our neighborhood the day after the tornado and subsequent days trying to get everyone to sign with him. When he came to our house he told me that he had signed "all of your neighbors. You're the ONLY ONE who hasn't signed." And he tried to tell me that if I didn't get a contractor soon, I wouldn't be able to get one. He went further to say that I should have a contractor hired before the insurance adjuster was scheduled to come out. He was trying to scare me. S came to my rescue and told him to buzz off. By that time he had already convinced 3 neighbors to sign with him. On Friday he was arrested for stealing from a charity organization that was here to help us. (Samaritan's Purse) See news article below.

http://www.wral.com/news/news_briefs/story/9563223/

I'm feel awful for the three families that signed contracts with him. In my head I can't comprehend trying to take advantage of people who are in an already distressed position. He used tactics that were just downright disgusting to play on the minds (and hearts) of those here. The thing he got arrested for wasn't half of what he's done. I really hope that charges are pressed and further investigation is done. It's not my story to tell, which is why I'm refraining, but I share the news story to caution everyone in the Raleigh area to beware of this business.

Today was a family day at home. Despite a little drama over losing something (entirely my fault although I do admit I cast some blame elsewhere ;)) all was better once it was located a few hours later. I even managed to get in a good bike ride with my best girl. She only yelled a few times to go faster. One of those times being when I had to get off the bike to walk it up a hill. Seriously. Almost died. I didn't realize I had it in the wrong gear and almost fell off of it half way up the hill. Realized it was in the wrong gear when I got back ON the bike at the top of the hill. The whole rest of the way up (about a minute) all I heard was Mommy, why aren't you riding the bike?! A few cars passed me giggling. I waved and smiled. As if it was all part of my plan. We also devised a new game. Katherine yells ONE TWO THREE WEEEEEEEEE and at the point of yelling WEEEEEE I'm to spread my legs in a V, taking them off the pedals and yell WEEEEEE with her. I'll admit. I liked it. More than I probably should have. We did that a lot. And she had NO forgiveness whether it was a hill going up, down, flat, or otherwise. Made for an interesting ride. Can't wait to do it again. ;)

I know I say it with each blog, but I continue to think it bears repeating. We're so grateful for the support that has been given. The cards we've received. The notes of encouragement, offers for help and gifts to help us with damages and replacing things. We've already used some of the gift cards and have plans for most of the others. The cash we're using for the out of pocket expenses that insurance doesn't cover. It's all so very much appreciated. Thank you doesn't seem like enough, but they're the only words I can think of right now.

I hope all of the Mommy readers had a fantastic Mother's Day. With my favorite people around me, how could I have anything but a good mother's day. It took quite a while today for K to wish me a Happy Mother's Day... but once she did, it was oh so sweet.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XdHqa1vWYrg

Love,
Dar, Stephen & KK
xo

It's not normal... but it's routine! =)

You might not know this about me, but I'm a softie. I'm a big emotional sap. mmhhhmm. Shocking, I know. ;) Particularly when it comes to my family. Today a message from Katherine's daycare had me crying at least half a dozen times.

After the tornado we shared with school what had happened. One, because if anything started to go amiss at school that they could be on the lookout and let us know. Two, I wanted to know where the safe room was for the school. (I now enter buildings and look around for where it would be safe to go... I'm sure this will relax in time, but right now it's what I do. I also want to continually run to Dorton Arena's basement since that protected us the first time around.) The Directors at the school asked if there was anything to do to help. As I mentioned in previous blogs I continue to struggle with "asking" for help. I like to give it - but don't really know how to accept it. I know it's as much for them as it is for me - and in fact the CEO of the company Stephen and I work at, mentioned this during a speech he gave on Saturday night. People WANT to help. When you let them help, it makes everyone feel better. It reminded me, yet I still struggle. First step is acknowledging?? Or is that just for AA?

Today one the Directors at school emailed Stephen and I to share two things:
- On the Friday before the tornado the school had their annual Spring Fling. (We went and had a blast. KK didn't come out of the jump house for a good 45 minutes.) Part of the Spring Fling is to raise money for charity organizations the school supports. They decided to take the total raised at the event and donate half to the three families at the school that were affected by the tornados on 4/16/11.
- They credited our account for one week's tuition.

To say I found this to be extremely generous would be an understatement. Stephen and I both went into school this afternoon when we picked K up to give them a hug and say thank you. Of course a formal thank you will come - but truly, brought me to tears (multiple times).

In the last week a few things happened.
1. We learned that the city was (is) not going to help clean up non-vegetative debris. Not the greatest news.
2. The news crews are just waiting for more drama to strike on our block. We know this because when there were high winds/storms forecasted last week they camped out on our block. Literally. Slept in their news vans with cameras on at least one house, waiting for it to fall, some more.
3. We didn't hear from the insurance company. This one is I s'pose more of a "what didn't happen" then what DID happen. Sigh.
4. After learning about #1, several neighbors and a few people from our neighborhood came to help on Saturday with debris clean up. Neighbors on both sides and across the street came to help up a few yards. One neighbor brought a truck (how he managed to get a one month old truck from his friend to haul debris... Not sure. But truly a test of friendship!! =)) A few others came over to help load the house debris into the truck. SA and the neighbor, as well as others, made numerous trips to the dump to get rid of the debris. After about 7 hours the two larger piles in front of our house and the neighbors house was gone, and a few other smaller piles were removed. Pretty impressive manual labor.
5. The organized church groups in this area again came to help with clean up. These people have a very special place in heaven waiting for them.
6. Vacuuming is therapeutic. For me. I spent more hours vacuuming in the last 24 hours than I typically do sleeping on a given night. And I heart me some sleeping. On Sunday I spent 5+ hours vacuuming floors, walls, window, screens, baseboards and the carpets again. I didn't step on glass today although I did find some more this morning. Fortunately it was found by glimmering light - not by my foot. While most of our windows have holes in the screen and damage to the actual window, it's nice to be able to look out the window and not see insulation all over the screen/window. And I can't see the insulation all over my house when I'm inside, so that's pretty great too.
7. Vacuuming the grass: Also awesome. While SA wasn't thrilled by my vacuuming the house for 5+ hours he did think vacuuming the yard was pretty awesome. I spent about 2 hours in the yard tonight vacuuming a space about 10'X6'. It looks pretty. Only 3/4 of the yard left to vacuum + all of the garden beds & plants. I should be finished by September. ;)

Good lessons and no doubt they'll continue.

On Friday we had a structural engineer come out to do an assessment. I haven't been able to sleep at night wondering if everything is okay. Yes, you look at the house and you think "it doesn't LOOK like it's going to fall down". But I'm not an engineer. Neither is SA. ;) He THINKS sometimes he is... alas, no dice. The engineer gave us the stamp of approval (literally and figuratively) that our house is structurally safe. WHEW!!! Friday was the first night I slept through the night. Thank you Mr Engineer. I heart you.

We continue to be asked if things are "back to normal". No. They're not. BUT, we have found a routine. And maybe this is the "new normal". I don't know - and I'll admit, right now, I don't much care. I care about my family being safe and our house getting fixed. The spectators on the street continue. I thought that by this time the drive-bys would be completed. They aren't. Some of the neighbors aren't fond of this - and I'll admit that there are times I wish it would just stop. There are other moments I think - if only we'd started to charge admission we could have hired some folks to help with the debris removal! :) Lately I've been thinking - I hope that this startles them. I hope that what they see scares the pants off of them. (Just not in front of my house.) I hope that the next time a tornado warning is issued, they run for cover of their safe room. I hope that the men that see our block respond intelligently and go to the safe room with their families versus standing outside waiting/watching for the tornado to come. So come visit. Come see what has happened on Serend!pity. If it helps YOU take this seriously - DO IT. The one thing I ask you not to do is tell us how awful it is. We appreciate the sentiment, but really, We got it. =)

As for tornado warnings... On Saturday as luck would have it SA and I attended a Gala for JDRF. It was the annual fundraising event for the organization and is a black tie affair. Fortunately SA and I already had our duds and neither were ruined by flying glass. Yay! I was honored by being chosen as one of the two folks to accept the corporate award for the company we work at. I, and my co-acceptor, are behind this giant screen as the speeches begin, waiting for our turn and we meet Greg Fischel. Nice guy. Really funny guy. Well, we have Greg signed up to call us should a tornado be in our area. Ahem. On April 16th Greg called our house (which we didn't know until power was restored a few days after the tornado) but he didn't call our cell phones. Our fault - wrong numbers were programmed. (For those in Raleigh we HIGHLY recommend you subscribe to this service... Small fee. Great warning system!) Anyway, Greg's "backstage" with us and the conversation goes something like this:
Darlene: "hey, thanks for the tornado warnings!!"
Greg: "Oh yeah! Sure! My pleasure! Where do you live?"
Darlene: "Serend!pity!"
Greg: "OH!!"

I made the TV guy speechless I s'pose and given he was our MC I didn't want to leave him that way, so I asked the only question I could think of at the time:
Darlene: "Do you have any lipstick?"
Greg: "No! HAHAHA"
Darlene: "Aw, Crap"

I really thought a TV guy might have a little gloss with him. Appears not. Or at least none that he was willing to share with me. He also tells really ridiculous (and I think amusing) jokes when trying to stall for time. I hope he MCs again next year... and I hope I'm invited again.

Continued thanks to everyone! Much love!
Darlene, Stephen & KK
xo

PS: I am struggling with whether or not anyone really wants to hear about the continued tornado "stuff". Do I keep blogging about it? Stop? Someone said, "that was so two weeks ago" - I know kiddingly but it does make me wonder if it's getting old. Let me know what you think. :)