It wasn't when a tornado hit our house. Although that played a factor in "the moment". It wasn't when we drove up to our block realizing that something very bad had happened. No, mine came when I realized I hadn't packed pajamas.
I've told the story many times... and this year I find myself needing more than ever to remember my "moment". I feel like lately I've started to "forget" and I'm grateful for the anniversary to "remember".
There was a period of about 30 minutes where I was worried our house was going to fall down. Practical? No. Realistic? No. What does one do when one thinks your house is going to fall down? Well, first you tell everyone to get the h$!! OUT!!! Except yourself. Okay - except ME and my friend Meredith. She tried to keep my head on straight. It was quite a chore I assure you.
I made the decision when I thought my house was going to fall down that it was the time to pack. Giant suitcases full of stuff. I think I packed Katherine's entire dresser. She's small. It was totally possible to stuff all her crap in one bag. Then I packed for Stephen and I. All of the important stuff... Dress shoes, dress pants, dress shirts, dresses, heels... You know, business clothes. Oh, and my best jewelry. (I'm not all dumb!)
When we arrived safely at the home of our dear friends Andrew and Tina, Stephen looked at the pile of suitcases in the back of my mini van and said (shaking his head)...
Stephen: Okay... what needs to come in?
Me: Um. All of it?! I don't know. I just threw stuff in!!!
Stephen: Okay... which bag do you think has pajamas.
Me: (confused) Er. Um. Hm. Pajamas? I don't recall putting any of those in the suitcase(S).
Blank stare.
Silence.
Stephen: Dar, there are 4 suitcases here. What in hell did you pack?
Me: (exasperated) WORK CLOTHES!!!!
Stephen: Seriously?
Me: Seriously.
Stephen shuts minivan gate, pulls me into the house shaking his head.
It was my moment. I didn't realize it then... but it was at the moment that I made the decision to pack work clothes instead of I don't know... something to sleep in, that made me rethink my priorities.
Some of you may recall my work tendencies back then. 55-60 hour weeks were the norm. I occasionally had a 70 hour week. My thoughts (and I remember them distinctly even two years later) as I thought my house was going to fall down was "what am I going to wear to work on Monday... I have to go in and deliver performance evaluations to my team!!" My boss, in the wake of the events, told me "don't worry about it - you can deliver them on the phone." This was moment #2 if there was one. I was facing questions like, can we live here? Is our home structurally sound and I was concerned about, and directed to, give my performance plans on schedule... Just "remotely".
Two weeks ago I received a call requesting I come to the Trauma Unit at the local hospital. They wouldn't tell me what happened, just that I had to come. I waited three hours in a family waiting room with no information imagining all sorts of horrible things. (hard) Knock #1.
Today a terrible tragedy occurred in Boston. Your life can change in a split second. Knock #2.
I don't think I need a knock #3. Consider me reminded.
Of what? Lately I've found myself getting sucked into the too late work days. Too many hours. Too much time away from my family and friends "handling things" happening at work.
I am reminding myself here and now... There will always be more work than can be done. There will never be enough time with my family and friends.
So the deliverables are going to start waiting... I have date nights to be had, cakes to bake, craft projects to make, ballet recitals to go to, pre-school graduations to attend, swim classes to shuttle to and Sunday family dinners to make. I'm sure you'll understand if I don't respond to your email right away.
I put together some pictures of then and now... I'm so proud of all of the work Stephen has done outside to restore our yard & grass. I tease that he's like an old man out there working on his grass to make it "cushy green" but I really do appreciate it so much. I'm full of pride when someone walking by stops to compliment him on his "lush green lawn".
I don't cringe thinking about Katherine running around in the grass barefoot anymore. I don't worry about her playing in the garden beds and finding shards of glass, roof, siding and other assorted debris.
Thank you honey! You're amazing!!! I love you!!!
 |
 |
| This slideshow made with Smilebox |
